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Where Unkers over 30 sip Lavazzas, rave about Alfas and reminisce lost but not forgotten SoulmateS...

Wednesday, November 16, 2005

10 Unker Tips To Snag That SYT (And Keep Her)

Perhaps Unker Muffy can provide some advise. Are you listening all ye recently broken-hearted and ignored? :))

1. Bottoms up, shoes maketh the man. There is a pair for every occasion. Have them nice and clean please. They speak volumes about your taste and attention to detail. Ditto about fingernails and toenails. An expensive shirt and tie ensemble cannot save scruffy footwear and left-over booger under the cuticles :))

2. 'No' is just a 2-letter word. Learn when to accept it with grace and dignity. However, do note that sometimes a 'no' actually means a 'yes'. We're talking women here, hello! :))

3. Be yourself, but you don't have to tell her EVERYTHING about your deep, dark, sordid past do you? Just titillate her with the fact that you are no angel.

4. Sometimes the moody aesthetics of the bedroom and the words you whisper do much more for multiple orgasms than your manhood and groping paws.

5. There is a real danger of being so Metrosexual that she doesn't want to get sexual with you anymore. Your best metrosexual bits turn her on when she least expects it. Surprise!

6. Listen without Prejudice. And no, I'm not talking George Michael here. Talented faggot 'tho.

7. Don't fake maturity, they can tell. On the other hand, don't act cute, it really sucks when you can't carry it off.

8. Your IQ will attract them, your EQ will snag them, but it is your AQ that will sustain them. caveat : I'm assuming above average numbers here :))

9. Diamonds are a girl's best friend.

10. Put your character and career in place and the good, discerning chicks will pick you out accordingly. They have a way of sniffing out Security, don't worry.

so there! happy hunting :))

10 Comments:

Blogger kona said...

vedy pointedS wor, muffadoo! LOL

4:51 PM  
Blogger kona said...

cannnn....fatssss :))

5:51 PM  
Blogger FlyingMuffyn said...

titillate all u wan but dun mutilate..:))

anyway hope the points were not too crappy :))

9:50 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

well, u're happily married aren't u? :)

10:39 AM  
Blogger FlyingMuffyn said...

yes teapot i am...:))

4:02 PM  
Blogger unkster said...

doesn't mean an unker cannot phantasize...

12:41 AM  
Blogger FlyingMuffyn said...

too much phantasizing wait the phantom cum and catch u! :))

2:11 AM  
Blogger kona said...

phantasmagorical experience then LOL

11:14 AM  
Blogger FlyingMuffyn said...

muffy flips dick-tionary

1:35 AM  
Blogger kona said...

dun flip the wrong thing hor... ;)

7:33 AM  

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