I have actually been mulling over this the past few weeks.
Whether I should be starting a Blog of my own.
But I am undecided.
On one hand, Unkster has become the repository of my hopes and dreams, trials and tribulations, happy and sad times, over the past 2.5 years. And I suppose, in my own little way, I've given an insight into the life of a sometimes screwed-up 30-something. Whether that insight translates into any useable information for the reader apart from being, what I call, nothing-else-better-to-do reading, remains to be seen. Call it stupid sentimentality if you like.
When we first started out in October 2005, I had not even kept a diary before. Unkster was supposed to provide a tongue-in-cheek glimpse into the lives of a trio (and later quartet) of thirty year olds. A place to chit-chat about growing up in an age where you're too old to be gushing about having a crush on a colleague, but too young to be discussing taking out your CPF savings.
Some call it the Quarter-Life Crisis. And its not unlike the Quarter-pounders they used to sell at Macdonalds. You're like a big burger, sandwiched in between the call for increasing responsibility and the allure of re-discovering your recently spent youth. You've reached a plateau of stability. And yet ironically, the road ahead still looks a little fuzzy. Maybe its just me.
On the other hand, I wish the rest would write a little more. Afterall, this is not
MY Blog alone. Its name should really read Unksters and not Unkster. And perhaps therein lies the problem. Unkster has become my personal journal. And this has somehow taken away the
raison d'etre for its existence. So maybe if I have to be the only one talking (on most occasions anyway), I might as well take my inane ramblings somewhere else. Alone.
A diary need not always be about self-discovery. Or contain melancholic entries about the pitfalls of living and loving in the 21st Century. It should be about anything you want to say or do. Most importantly, it should be true and reflect how you really feel. You owe that much to yourself. But the trouble with online diaries is that you then open up huge portions of your life to public scrutiny. This has the dual effect of making you feel liberated one moment, then exposed and vulnerable the next.
Maybe all this is a reflection of how I am getting more and more afraid of sharing my life with anyone else, whether in the real physical world or bunking-in together in Cyberspace.
I am getting abit solitary.
And that scares me.
Labels: Musings