Has 2005 Past Me By Oredi?...

Goodness, everyone I know is feeling so nostalgic since its like 3 hours to go before 2006 dawns upon us. And where am I? In office sitting infront of my computers, still struggling with emails and staff appraisal reports. To my frens who are catching the fireworks at Marina South, "You never see synchronised explosive bursts before ah? What's the big fat hairy deal?". The grapes are souring nicely thanks :))

I can't say 2005 has been a very eventful year. In fact, it has past me by so fast I'm left wondering just what I have been doing with my life. I suspect not very much! :))

Anyway nowadays its so unglam to make New Year resolutions. Everybody says they don't stick to their resolutions anyway. Neither have I. Just the other day someone was trying to explain to me the difference between a goal and a resolution. Who the hell cares! :))

Bur hor, since this is a BLOG and peeper have told me that they get to know me that much better online when I'm not spewing rubbish in person, I shall just say a few words of what I would hope to see happen for myself in 2006, seriously and simply...

1. I hope to make the Missus happier in 2006. In our busy and independent lives, it would be nice to chill out together and just spend more time listening to each other and really communicating. And yes, I should talk less :))

2. I hope to be a better leader, mentor and friend to my staff and officers. Starting with walking the talk and taking a more holistic approach in tackling their emotional/family/financial concerns as well outside of work.

3. I hope to travel a little more on leisure than I did in 2005.

4. And for the Metro in me, I want to finally have a 6-pack by June 2006 :P God Help Me! Ok at least 4-pack, if not 2 :))

So there! HAPPY NEW YEAR everybardy! :o

Walking Away

When do you have the courage to walk away?

From a long-term relationship or marriage that just doesn't seem to be working out. Easier said then done no doubt. And when there are kids and matrimonial assets involved, the propensity to grit your teeth and endure the frustration is stronger. But even walking away from a Significant Other of 5-10 years takes a whole lot of determination and single-mindedness, not to mention the heartache of realizing that much time was wasted in a futile investment of feelings.

What gives a person that extra iota of self-confidence to say au revoir? A new love perhaps. Or a soulmate that has finally, finally come knocking on your door. Maybe you've just about had it with the hurtful bickering, the increasingly divergent tangents of view, the ironic love-less love-making. Or the perfect and right boy/girl back then has simply become the wrong partner now? Perhaps too much emotional baggage is weighing the relationship down?

The easy way would be to tell yourselves to hang in there for a little bit more and see how things work out. But for how long and after how much misery? Trouble is, no one wants to make the final decision to call it quits. And there is rarely mature agreement between both parties on why things have turned out the way they have. Psychologically, the blame-game has begun. And when the selfish finger-pointing is allowed to fester beneath the facade of ' we're trying to work things out', mutual-denial only prolongs the inevitable ending.

When you test-drive a car and don't like it, you just return it. Wish it was this easy with marriages and relationships...

O' Heavy the Weight on the Unkers Shoulders!

On a recent trip back to KL, I met up with a good friend. We met over nasi lemak and a car wash. Well, it is one of those routines I regularly keep whenever I go back to KL. I drop by late at night to a 24 hour carwash, and have a delicious, piping hot plate of nasi lemak at my favourite stall in Kampung Baru. This time, I had a good friend with me.

We talked the usual guy talk - girls, cars, girls, wifey and kids, girls, work, etc etc. Did I mention girls?

The conversation took a serious tone when we started talking about the added responsibility of being and adult (err.. read as unker!). We started talking about this as a spin off from a discussion about his brother in law's recent wedding. This guy is 28 and is just a big kid who can't even tie his own shoelace (metaphorically speaking). His wife is stationed overseas, so all the planning etc was left to him. Now, if you have ever been involved in any kind of even planning (let a lone a wedding) you know how much work is involved. This guy did practically nothing until 2 weeks before the wedding. In the end everyone, including my friend Nick, had to jump in and salvage the whole thing.

While this was not the purpose of this post, here is a taste of how irresponsible this fellow is. One week before the wedding he disappears, doesn't pick up phone calls and even forgot to go pick his fiance up from the airport. When someone finally got him on the phone his answer was "i'm too stressed from the wedding planning". err... what planning? he didn't do anything, remember?

Which brings me to my point. As an adult (err.. read as Unker!) we have so many responsibilities on our little iddy biddy (ok.. i meant giant fat) shoulders. Yet, deep down inside, most of us really would rather be having fun and letting the child in us out to play. Its important to strike a balance - not too serious all the time with 'adult' (read as Unker!) things, but at the same time, need to ensure not 100% childish and irresponsible. It gets harder and harder to strike this balance, in my opinion, as one gets older and the responsibilities get heavier (like my tummy gets heavier)... the danger is that we end up on either extreme - being too uptight and angry all the time from all the stress brought on by the responsibilities, or being totally irresonsible and letting everything get messed up until eventually, you end up with extra stress trying to sort them out before the police come!

What do you think?

'Yucky' Yucca

Paid a small fortune for this, including delivery today, re-potting and for the nursery people to get rid of my scale-infested Chinese bamboo. For the botanist in you, its called Yucca Elephantipes (cos the base of the stem resembles a swollen Dumbo foot) and its a native of North America and Mexico. I know some of you will find it fugly but the wifey and me like it. We think it looks like some living sculpture.

Hope the 'Yucky' Yucca lasts though...

One Tree Does Not a Forester Make

Drool drool drool. I'm madly in love with the new Subaru Forester XT variant, all 2.5litres, turbo-charged 227bhp of it. After test driving one yesterday, I'm convinced I need to dump my 2 yr old lumbering Renault Megane2, which is fast becoming a blardy common runabout for balding middle-aged semi-geriatrics with Alonso-like aspirations :))



I need a reality check though. Its not going to be cheap and seriously, this vainpot doesn't REALLY have to change cars. Its a WANT, not a NEED!

Pros
1. The Subaru is one heck of a drive. Powerful and feels extremely planted around corners for a sizeable SUV. Will beat the RAV4s, CRVs and X-Trails at the lights anyday! heh heh!
2. With the added boot space, the wifey wants to add two more dogs to the family zoo.
3. We can re-live our off-roading excursions and go back to the days when we had our Pajero (at least I hope so but more on that later)
4. The dealership is throwing in a Thule roof rack upon purchase. Yummy.
5. The Forester is quite chng-able (hokkien-speak for Modify-able). Soon I can give it the 'aggro' treatment with a full frontal Bull-guard, sideskirts and a kick-ass bonnet air-scoop. I wanna unleash the Beng in me!
6. The 2-stage Sun-roof is fabulous and the SUV comes with a MoMo steering wheel, Cruise Control and side-mirror indicator lights as standard.

Cons
1. The petrol bill is going to kill me. Got to constantly feed the 2.5l turbo-charged engine and lug around 1.5tonnes of metal on permanent 4WD.
2. A significant jump in Road Tax
3. The Forester has definite off-roader looks but I suspect on-roader manners. I hope I don't have to be rescued by a Defender whilst in the mud.
4. It comes only with stock 16inch Yokohama All-Terrain Geolander tyres. The dealership will not have it upgraded to 17-inchers, saying it will alter the driving dynamics of the SUV.
5. The interior plastics and materials, although not cheapskate, gives you a typical Japanese tactile experience. And I'm so used to Conti.

Decisions decisions.....sigh :))

3 Boxes on Boxing Day

Who knows the true meaning of Boxing Day? Hands up! I sure don't. And like most goondus, I think that Boxing Day is the day you clear the house of the blardy boxes that have accumulated from all those pressies and gifts. But I'm also certain that its some angmo invention and a sorry excuse for those lazy buggers to give themselves another public holiday to shop at stores that put up excess Christmas inventory for sale at cut-throat prices.

Anyway today, I had my own 3 Boxes to contend with.

In the morning, I opened the box containing the pressie from my Mum. She has given me books for the past 6 Christmas-es and since this year's gift came in a squarish package, I was expecting something else, FINALLY! But alas it was not to be. I ripped open the gaudy wrapper to reveal a flat-ish box with a book inside, Rick Warren's Purpose Driven to be exact. I have no heart to tell Mum that these days, my bedtime readings include the trashy local entertainment weekly 8-Days, FHM S'pore and the UK car mag TopGear (where I do my own pyjama-purpose driving). Ok so Mr Warren has been on the New York Times and Wall Street Journal's #1 Bestsellers list. But I'm not yet ready to know God's purpose for me in this sad world through a 40-day spiritual journey that will supposedly transform my life. I am a materialistic epicurean Pagan destined to rot in hell with my Guccis! :)) On hindsight I shouldn't be blogging about this in here since I may want to give the book away next Christmas *blush* :))

In the afternoon, I finally had a taste of the famed Japanese Box dat is the Subaru boxer engine at the marque's new Hub in Toa Payoh. I test drove the Forester 2.5XT Turbo AWD, a mighty powerful sonofabitch of a SUV if i may say so. And when the salesman told me to take the bend dat wuz Lorong 7 at 90km/h, I did so, confirming the fact that the low-mounted boxer pistons does do wonders for traction, stability and all dat Symmetrical AWD hullabaloo. This is one fast SUV that doesn't know whether it wants to be a performance sedan or 4WD jungle-crawler. Perfect for fickle and finicky ole me! :)) But the salesman has to tell me how much I would be losing on my Renault first and then I must figger out what kinda sedatives I need to imbibe to numb the pain :))

In the early evening, the wifey dragged me shopping, AGAIN! We spent an hour in Mr Klein's trendy CK Jeans store alone. I tell you the stuff at the shop wasn't cheap, even with the discounts, and yet there was a crowd the size of a mini New York Stock Exchange trading floor on a Monday morning. A long line of grumpy CK-aficionados formed to the fitting-room and when it finally came to our turn, there was this blardy Chinaman who was running in and out of one of the little cubicles, each time bringing with him more tops and bottoms for his fat wife to try on, totally oblivious to the throng of impatient faces making loud tsk-tsks. At one point when I heard giggling coming from the inside, I felt like banging down the fitting-room door and giving the half-bald gent a nice big box (read punch) on his smug face. And someone please tell him, in heavily-accented Mandarin, that CK jeans are not for women with butts the size of small continents :))

So there, me and my boxes on Boxing Day...hope you had fun too!

Unker@TheMovies - The Promise

OK I confess.

I watched The Promise (aka Master of The Crimson Armour) on Christmas Eve primarily for Cecilia Cheung. You see I am quite besotted with this HongKong-born, Aussie-educated lass. To me she ranks right up there with Ms Zhang Ziyi, whom it seems has taken quite a bit of flak recently for her lead role in Memoirs of a Geisha. But more on Ms Zhang later, when I've seen the gorgeous geisha drop her kimino in Kyoto lah :P

But seriously, I've always had a thing for big-budget Chinese epics like Ang Lee's Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon, Zhang Yimou's Hero and House of Flying Daggers as well as Tsui Hark's Seven Swords. Don't ask me why but it must be the beautiful Chinese scenery and the fantastic Chinois sets and costumes that make me all tingly.

The Promise, in most respects, doesn't dissapoint. The 42-million-dollar blockbuster by renowned Director Chen Kaige, is the biggest-budgeted film in China's cinematic history. It stars Korean heart throb Jang Dung-Kun, Japan's Hiroyuki Sanada and Hongkie real-life lovebirds (ok on-and-off lah, I'm not sure) Cecilia Cheung and Nicholas Tse. Shot in exotic locations throughout China, it has won rave reviews from the mainland press for its vivid imagery and high-tech special effects. Something of a Chen Kaige for the masses.

The storyline revolves around a slave Kunlun(Jang), who grows to be a hero as he fights his fate and falls in love with a beautiful princess (Cheung), who is bound by her promise to the Goddess of Destiny that her great beauty comes at the expense of finding true love. Of course this is an over-simplification of a messy love triangle that erupts when Sanada, who plays the glorious General Guangming and master of the slave and the evil Duke Wuhuan (Tse) enter the fray.

If you can close one eye to the fantastic (read bordering on the ridiculous) scenes of Kunlun running so fast he flies and the show's frequent forays into time travel, the luscious sets/costumes and very eye-candy-gorgeous Cheung and Jang should be enough to keep you satiated. The plot, although not razor-sharp, retains enough bite to keep pace with the wonderful cinematography so characteristic of Kaige. I also particularly liked General Guangming's crimson army, which to me was so reminiscent of Darth Vader's red-clad Imperial Guards on the deck of his Imperial Star Destroyer.

More importantly, I could feel for the beautiful but emotionally lonely Princess YingCheng as well as the poor slave Kunlun who struggles between his true feelings of affection for the tortured damsel and his desire to obey his master the General. Tse is credible as the evil Duke who is also enamoured with the Princess and at the same time pretty fed up with having to live beneath the shadow of the illustrious Guangming. You could say Tse has a knack for playing the bad boy.

The Promise doesn't promise to delight just about anyone and everyone. But if you're looking for a dose of romantism with a huge dollop of class and good acting, Kaige's latest is for you.

Ho Ho Ho!

So this is Christmas
And what have you done
Another year over
And a new one just begun
And so this is Christmas
I hope you have fun
The near and the dear ones
The old and the young

Blessed Christmas everybody!!! Hope you guys had as much fun reading this BLOG as much as we had Blogging it.

The Eve's Activities

I can't say Christmas has sneaked up on me. In fact, me and the wifey saw it coming. And yet we had to do our pressie-buying only today. Been helluva busy lah the both of us. Anyway, Mission Accomplished!, albeit after 4 hours of hopping from one shop to another and elbowing our way thru' the hordes. Phew!

And so now, as Diana Krall is crooning Chet's Nuts on the Bose, I am taking a break from wrapping all those darn gifts. Actually my job is to cut scotch-tape for the wifey as she wraps all 14 pressies. I am the not-so-little Santa elf in my singlet and boxers :))

Before shopping today, we managed to squeeze in a fantastic Dim Sum lunch with a couple of friends at Wah Lok. (Well Russ, i hope u had your fill of Buns and Dumplings cos you're gonna have Rosti and Sausages for the next 2 weeks in Europe!) I also had a much needed Long Black at the Thos SB cafe at Swissotel.

After all the pushing and shoving, we also managed to catch Chen Kaige's The Promise in the evening. Actually it was a toss-up between this and CS Lewis' Chronicles of Narnia. In the end, the very delectable Cecilia Cheung and the lush Chinese cinematography won over a couple of angmo kids, a talking lion and a white bitch..err..witch :)) And all thru' the movie, my blardy handphone was vibrating non-stop with sms-es carrying compliments of the yuletide season. I think most people were rushing to send their greetings before the networks clog up at midnite.

Anyway, we're both deadbeat. We started off wanting to keep today nice and relaxed since we have 3 parties and a wedding luncheon to attend tommorrow! Should have known better.

Wadever, this elf is being summoned....4 more pressies to go...back to my scotch-tape...;))

a seasonal joke...

wakakakakaka.....LMFAO!!! :))


One Christmas Eve, a frenzied young man ran into a pet shop looking for an unusual Christmas gift for his wife. The shop owner suggested a parrot, named Chet, which could sing famous Christmas carols.

This seemed like the perfect gift. "How do I get him to sing?" The young man asked, excitedly.

"Simply hold a lighted match directly under his feet like this," was the shop owner's reply. Chet began to sing "Jingle Bells! Jingle Bells! ..

The shop owner then held another match under the parrot's right foot. Then Chet's tune changed, and the air was filled with "Silent Night, Holy Night..."

The young man was so impressed that he paid the shop-keeper and ran home as quickly as he could with Chet under his arm. When the wife saw her gift she was overwhelmed. "How beautiful!" She exclaimed, "Can he talk?"

"No," the young man replied, "But he can sing. Let me show you."

So the young man whipped out his lighter and placed it under Chet's left foot, as the shop-keeper had shown him, and Chet crooned, "Jingle Bells!

The man then moved the lighter to Chet's right foot, and out came, "Silent Night. Holy Night..."

The wife, her face filled with curiosity, then asked, "What if we hold the lighter between his legs?" The man did not know. "Let's try it." He answered, eager to please his wife.

So they held the lighter between Chet's legs. Chet twisted his face, cleared his throat, and sang out loudly (like it was the performance of his life)






GUESS WHAT????









C'MON GUESS LAH!











"Chet's nuts roasting on an open fire...." :))

This Is Anfield

Ok I can't sleep. You know how dreams can sometimes affect your mood out of the blue. The sub-conscience speaking to you? And since I had a dream about watching Pool host Spurs at Anfield on telly with my late father while snoozing this afternoon, thought I put this poster up.

Dad, we're number 3 in the Premiership now. Hope u get to watch Rafa & Co up there...

Unker@TheMovies - King Kong

As promised, my humble take on Peter Jackson's movie and childhood fantasy with the big hairy ape, King Kong. And oh My God! the fella (and I mean good ole Pete and not Ah Kong) has lost so much weight! Not so long ago, Mr Jackson looked like a blardy gorilla himself. But i digress...:))


Anyway went to catch the show with a another couple yesterday. And just for the special occasion, I wuz slurping on a double-scooped cone of ben and jerry's Chunky Monkey ice cream in the cinema.

2 words - Blardy Long! All bladder-bursting 183 minutes of it.

Peter had us sit thru' almost 70 mins of his wonderfully CGI-ed Manhattan before the silver-backed one scooped Ann Darrow (Naomi Watts) away into the forest. By the time Ah Kong appeared, my own Chunky Monkey was well and truly digested. I hear in the original 1933 production, the protaganists were on the slow boat to Skull Island within 15mins of the show's opening. Fast game chop chop. But Peter chose to show us scenes like Ms Darrow stealing an apple and standing forlornly outside a strip club. Waste time lah I say.

And our dear Ermenegildo Zegna-shod Adrien Brody, who plays playwright Jack Driscoll, looked so scrawny I thought he was an opium addict from the Far East. But I pity him lah, since he had to fight for Ann's affection and attention from a walking giant fur rug. Kudos to Adrien though, he played the brave understated brooding hero to the hilt. But Ah Kong wanted to snap him like a bamboo twig for having the gall to lure Ann away from his grasp. Well if Adrien carries on being so skinny, he can shoot The Pianist II without going on a diet and proceed to hide inside his piano away from the Germans. ahaha!

Carl Denham (played by Jack Black of Skool of Rock fame) deserved to die in the movie but sadly didn't. Such an irritating conniving dirtbag, Ah Kong should have bitten his head off (both heads) and farted it out for the T-rexes to have another go. But I suspect Peter kept him alive so that he could spew a stupid 1-liner at the end of the movie "Its a case of Beauty killed the Beast". Gosh! Puke!

As for Naomi Watts who plays Ann Darrow, My-oh-my what can I say. A true 1930-ish Vaudeville sexpot I would love to catch at her nightly show time and time again, if I was a hot-blooded male New Yorker back then lah. I tell you the girl can scream. And scream and scream again she did, with so much finesse. In the end, deep down inside, she is torn between the scrawny but artsy Driscoll and the beefy 25-footer of a mutant banana. So when Ah Kong falls to his death, iconically from the top of the Empire State Building after his not-so-successful attempts at swotting machine-gunned bi-planes, it made life easier for her. No need to choose between the 2 guys you see.

The throngs who have caught the movie will attest to the tremendous special effects churned out by NZ-based Weta Studios. The Brontosaurus stampede was real and thumpy. So too was Ah Kong's back-yard brawl with 3 T-Rexes - especially the part when he breaks the jaws of one of them and plays with it for abit. Keeewl! Then there were the creepy-crawly mutant arachnids and what looked to me like Angry Penises swallowing people up. ahaha!

The natives on Skull Island were also pretty authentically scary. Although I suspect Peter recycled some of the muddy face paint and body-piercing paraphenalia from his Orcs and Uruk-Hai. Come to think of it, the big Ann Darrow sacrifice scene resembled the Battle of Mordor.

One scene made me cringe though, with Ah Kong and Ann sharing a short-lived, 'romantic' 'ice-skating' moment in Central Park. It bordered on the ridiculous and I cheered silently when the slip-n-sliding duo were interrupted by the bazookas of the US Army. ahaha.

Overall an engaging movie. Heard that Peter got a blank cheque for this from Universal Pictures. He may have got a trifle too self-absorbed in the movie's beginning but hell, not many people can make grown adults go teary-eyed over a CGI-ed Gorilla.

The Chunky Monkey RaWkz! :))

unker kona wishes one and all...

...a blessed Christmas and a wonderful 2006 ahead...and in the midst of all your merrymaking, do not forget the real meaning of Christmas k?

and while we're at it, anyone wanna buy me an iPod video for christmas?? LOL...went down to the apple shop @ wheelock place yesterday and got a hands-on feel of that little bugger...sheesh, i nearly whipped out my credit card there and then...

http://www.apple.com/ipod/ipod.html

s$548 "only"...sigh...i'm in utter lust...

20 Things I Could Do Less With or Without In 2006

1. My Mother-in-law
2. S'poreans who love to travel to Johor Bahru
3. Tsunamis, Earthquakes and Falling Skies
4. Unwanted attention from fugly women and anonymous Christmas cards
5. Income tax, road tax, property tax, goods & services tax...
6. Rainy days
7. Plummeting COE prices and therefore more cars on the road
8. My doggies going to the vet
9. Sticky and humid nights
10. Fried Foods and too much Carbo
11. Taxi Drivers, period
12. Cheesy local productions on TV
13. Funerals
14. Squabbling with the Mrs
15. Eating after 9pm
16. Handing out Ang Pow
17. Hypocrites
18. Madonna in lycra
19. Any mention of the NKF saga and peanuts
20. Marlboro Menthol Lights

20 Things I Want or Wanna See More Of In 2006

1. My Mummy
2. Eunice Olsen speaking (and looking) passionately in Parliament. If she can sing and play the piano so much the better.
3. Short getaways to exotic regional destinations like Siem Reap and Lombok
4. Sleep
5. Jessica Alba
6. Long-lost ex-Classmates scattered over 2 hemispheres
7. A Landrover Freelander in Safari Green
8. Peace and Quiet in Southern Thailand, Iraq, Australia, India, Indonesia, France..blah blah blah
9. Smashin' bands like Maroon5, Keane and Coldplay
10. An Abercrombie and Fitch Store on Orchard Road
11. Cecilia Cheung, Lin Zhiling, Fiona Xie and Zhang Ziyi in Charlie's Angels IV
12. A blue and green-eyed Siberian Husky called Shelby
13. Solitary time
14. Biceps, triceps and Cross-country runs
15. Sunny Days for tanning
16. Walking The Talk
17. Granny's Peranakan cooking
18. Rainy Nights for sleeping
19. Avril Lavigne in a string Bikini on the cover of Arena
20. Life's little pleasures like a strong expresso with the Sunday paper or a day out with the dogs at the beach

'Tis The Season To Be TAG-gy

Howzzabout dis? X'mas and bonus pressie to myself! :)) I have a boring, black-faced Link Automatic Chrono which the wifey bought for me 2 years ago that I would gladly exchange for this Ferrari-Red Formula-1 beaut. Juz in time for Chinese New Year somemore!

I'm also lusting after the leather-strapped Monaco series but that's waaaay off my pathetic civil servant paycheck!

An Anonymous Goodbye

I received a Christmas card in the mail a couple of days ago. It was not signed off. And written in small but immaculate handwriting on the unprinted half were these paragraphs. Thinking it was some poem, I soon realised that the words were actually the lyrics to James Blunt's melancholic Goodbye My Lover.

Did I disappoint you or let you down?
Should I be feeling guilty or let the judges frown?
'Cause I saw the end before we'd begun,
Yes I saw you were blinded and I knew I had won.
So I took what's mine by eternal right.
Took your soul out into the night.
It may be over but it won't stop there,
I am here for you if you'd only care.
You touched my heart you touched my soul.
You changed my life and all my goals.
And love is blind and that I knew when,
My heart was blinded by you.
I've kissed your lips and held your head.
Shared your dreams and shared your bed.
I know you well, I know your smell.
I've been addicted to you.

Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.

I am a dreamer but when I wake,
You can't break my spirit - it's my dreams you take.
And as you move on, remember me,
Remember us and all we used to be
I've seen you cry, I've seen you smile.
I've watched you sleeping for a while.
I'd be the father of your child.
I'd spend a lifetime with you.
I know your fears and you know mine.
We've had our doubts but now we're fine,
And I love you, I swear that's true.
I cannot live without you.

Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.

And I still hold your hand in mine.
In mine when I'm asleep.
And I will bear my soul in time,
When I'm kneeling at your feet.
Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.
I'm so hollow, baby, I'm so hollow.
I'm so, I'm so, I'm so hollow.

I haven't the slightest clue who sent the card. But the song's been in my head ever since...

To Praise Or Not To Praise

Its that time of the year again. When you take stock of the performance of your subordinates, grade them A-E, and decide whether you wanna reccommend them for promotion or shrink their bonus. To praise or not to praise, that is the question.

Yes the staff appraisal circus has arrived and I have a whopping 180 reports to go thru'. I'm soooo screwed. I'll never be able to finish by the X'mas deadline, NEVER!

So for the first time in like 3 years, I brought work home to do. And as I wuz ploughing thru' some of the reports, it dawned upon me that perhaps next year, I should get to know some of my officers better. It was pretty embarassing to realise that there were a few whom I have not spoken to in a year. A couple of faces I could not even remember meeting!

Anyway, I have different stacks of reports for each type of subordinate and I promised myself to give every category more unique attention next year. A New Year resolution of sorts.

Stack 1 - The Rising Stars

Such a joy to manage. Enthusiastic, Pro-active and Impatient for success, they are out to impress. The difficulties lie in managing their lofty expectations and getting them to calibrate their energies so they don't trip over their own 2 feet in their push upwards.

Stack 2 - The Old Farts

They just need to know that they are still useful and that the winds of change have not blown them too much off course. Respect from this group is blardy hard fought but once gotten, they provide an angle of experience that really complements your new and young ideas.

Stack 3 - The Neither-Here-Nor-There's

Characterised by the 30-somethings who have spent more than 10 years in the organization but are getting nowhere in their careers. In my opinion, the most challenging group to manage. They have lost their youthful enthusiasm but don't have enough elderly wisdom to be considered 'old birds'. A frustrated and disgruntled lot, most are resigned to their obvious career-plateaus and are just waiting for their next paycheck. I probably have to pray for divine intervention to help in motivating the NHNTs.

Stack 4 - The Younglings

Freshly minted from the Academy and barely a couple of months into the job. Experience tells me it takes about 5-6 months for their true colors to emerge for assessment. Well the right organisational values and work ethics have to be ingrained into their young minds before they are corrupted by the older naughty ones. Close supervision and a little micro-management required.

Stack 5 - The Chronically Ill

Some suffer from what I call the WUSS, Weekend Urgent Sickness Syndrome. Others have enough ailments to rival my 84 year old grandmother. I think we need an in-house doctor on stand-by.


Ok I better get back to those reports...:))

Destination Unkster - A Krabi Dilemma

We need a holiday!!!

Pretty stressed out these 2 months, wifey and me. Her business trip to Adelaide has been pushed to early 2006 and I was supposed to tag along. So thought we escape our little island for some sun and sand this Christmas. Somewhere close since I can't take that many days off and we want to be back home in time to cut the turkey and kiss under the mistletoe.

We both like the Sheraton Krabi Beach Resort which is situated in an unspoilt beachfront location on the quiet 1.8 km long Klong Muong Beach. Nestled discreetly in 16 landscaped hectares, all 246 guest rooms, including 30 Zen rooms and six Executive suites, feature refined Thai design influences, giving a unique urban resort feel. Perhaps we'll do a spot of rock-climbing and also take a boat out to nearby Ko Phi Phi.

But the price is quite prohibitive during the yuletide season, a very wallet-chomping 400 Sing dollars per night. Ouch! Hmmm. Anybody got any better ideas or reccomendations? The last thing we want is another Patong Beach in Phuket that's why we're steering clear of Ao Phra Nang which is the most developed beach in Krabi.

Unkster's Today In History - Remembering Pearl Harbor

In March 04, I was in Hawaii for a series of official meetings and had the opportunity to visit the very poignant Pearl Harbor. I remember that while my colleagues went crazy shopping for Gap, Banana Republic and A&F at Ala Moana Mall, I took a bus to the very popular tourist attraction that brought America into WWII, alone. As I stood in the USS Arizona Memorial, which was built on-top of the sunken behemoth still underwater, and gazed at the tablet that held the names of the thousands who perished, I had this sudden feeling of sadness and melancholy. Although it was crowded on the platform, nobody made a sound. There was this hushed silence of respect and regret.


From the ferry


Inside the Memorial


Those who perished

7 Dec 1941, at five minutes to eight o'clock, 183 Japanese warplanes ruined a perfectly fine Sunday morning on the island of Oahu in Hawaii. The base was not at a state of high alert. Many people were just waking when the first bombs were dropped. No one was prepared to do battle. Japanese aircraft had flown 230 miles from the north, originating from an attack force comprising six aircraft carriers and 423 planes.

The assault was the complete surprise the Japanese wanted, even though at 7:02 a.m., almost an hour before the first wave of planes arrived, two Army radar men on Oahu's northern shore had detected the attack approaching. They contacted a junior officer, who disregarded their reports, assuming they had instead spotted American B-17 bombers expected in from the West Coast of the U.S.

The first wave of Japanese planes, made up of 51 Val dive bombers, 50 high level bombers, 43 Zero fighters and 40 Kate torpedo bombers, attacked when flight commander Mitsuo Fuchida gave the now infamous battle cry "Tora! Tora! Tora!" (Tiger! Tiger! Tiger!) The second wave arrived shortly thereafter.

Pearl Harbor, on the southern coast of Oahu, housed the bulk of the Pacific Fleet at the time of the attack. Less than two hours later, 2,280 American servicemen and 68 civilians were dead, 1,109 were wounded, eight battleships were damaged and five sunk. Three light cruisers, three destroyers, and three smaller boats were lost, along with 188 aircraft.

The biggest loss that day was the USS Arizona, on which 1,177 crewmen were killed when a 1,760 pound bomb smashed through her decks and ignited her forward ammo magazine causing a terrible explosion. Fewer than nine minutes later she was underwater.

Pearl Harbor was the principal but not sole target of the Japanese attack that day. Other military installations on Oahu were hit. Hickam, Wheeler, and Bellows airfields, Ewa Marine Corps Air Station, Kaneohe Bay Naval Air Station, and Schofield Barracks suffered varying degrees of damage, with hundreds of planes destroyed on the ground and hundreds of men killed or wounded.

I also visited Hickam airfield where the bullet holes from the Japanese planes could still be seen peppered on the walls of some of the hangers and buildings, purposely left there as a reminder of that fateful day.

Style-Files@Unkster - Forbes Richest Fictional 15 (2005)

Taken from Forbes.com...they really bother to come up with something like dis :))...

Collectively, we are fascinated by the super-rich. We devour their biographies. We hang on their advice. Maybe we even hope for their downfall. But in our attempts to explain the ultra-rich--and their super-inflated bank accounts--we are often guilty of reducing real people to mere caricatures. There is the monopolist. The oracle. The genius. The thief.

With the Forbes Fictional 15, we have taken the opposite approach--fiction’s caricatures are elevated to the status of real people.

To qualify for the Fictional 15, we insisted that members be both fictional (in the sense that we excluded mythological and folkloric figures) and characters (meaning they are part of a narrative story or series of stories). Great wealth was required to be one of the primary attributes of the characters on this list - in other words, we looked for characters that were known, within their universes, for being rich.

Of course, there is one notable exception to all these rules: Santa Claus, who is mythological and not really known for his great wealth. Our excuse? We just couldn’t resist. What’s the point of doing a list about fictional characters if you can’t break the rules, at least just a little?

This list is an updated version of an earlier Fictional 15, which we published three years ago. After all, the passage of time affects even the timeless.


#1 Claus, Santa

Age: 1,600 years plus
Source: Toys
Net Worth: $∞
Hometown: New York City; North Pole
Marital Status: Married, no children

Born in the fourth century as Nicholas of Myra in Anatolia, now southwestern Turkey. According to legend, gave away bulk of his inheritance to provide dowries for three beautiful--but impoverished--maiden sisters. Famously threw gold through girls' chimney where it landed in their stockings drying by fire. Later Roman Catholic saint. Relics stolen by Italian merchants 12th century; bones now in Bari, southern Italy. Moved to U.S. by way of Holland; settled in New Amsterdam, later New York City. Changed name to Santa Claus, gained weight, grew beard. Toy manufacturing operations at North Pole yielding apparently unlimited wealth. Spends every Christmas Eve trying fruitlessly to give away fortune to little children. Keeping up with the times: Compressive of naughty and nice boys and girls now available on the Web. Passionate interest in artic wildlife: Large reindeer preserve includes rare flying and red-nosed specimens. Member since time immemorial.


#2 Warbucks, Oliver "Daddy"

Net Worth: $27.3 billion
Source: Defense Industries
Age: 52
Marital Status: Divorced, one child
Hometown: New York, N.Y.
Education: S.U.N.Y. Stony Brook, B.S.

Iraqi conflict has been kind to Warbucks; recipient of multiple defense contracts; cat-food holdings also up. Since adopting daughter Annie, has spent or given away much of his fortune, but still fiction's second-richest man. Rarely seen in public without bodyguards Punjab and Asp; both reputed to have mystical powers and great strength. Press reports charge Warbucks frequently pulls Annie out of school for globe-trotting jaunts with Sandy, her Airedale terrier. Member since 1924


#3 Rich, Richie

Net Worth: $17 billion
Source: Inheritance, Conglomerates
Age: 10
Marital Status: Single
Hometown: Richville, U.S.A.
Education: Richville Elementary

The "poor little rich boy" continues to share father's fortune with underprivileged kids in native Richville, paving basketball courts with gold and donating caviar to soup kitchens. Also: Successfully foiled plan by spoiled cousin Reggie Van Dough to cancel Christmas. But critics claim sinister intent underlies charitable exterior. Genetic engineering of "Dollarmatian" dogs with dollar-sign spots has animal rights groups fuming, and use of robotic maids led to wildcat strikes in Rich Industries' hotel group. Fortune took a hit after failed attempt to launch "Richie" fashion line, which consisted entirely of waistcoats and blue shorts. Member since 1953.


#4 Luthor, Lex

Net Worth: $10.1 billion
Source: Defense, Software, Real Estate
Age: 52
Marital Status: Single
Hometown: Metropolis, U.S.A.

Education: Metropolis University, B.S; Massachusetts Institute of Technology, Ph.D.
A year after his term as president ended in scandal, Luthor returned to the helm of LexCorp unbowed. Inventor of personal jetpack, robot guard dog said to be back in the lab. Singles out negative reporting by former friend and Daily Planet writer Clark Kent as "worst kind of tabloid journalism." Spent childhood in idyllic Smallville, Kans.; moved to Metropolis at age 21; built LexCorp into world's largest defense and software firm. Claims "superpowered do-gooders" are plotting to take over the world. Prominent supporter of "extropian" life-extension research. Member since 1940.


#5 Burns, Charles Montgomery

Net Worth: $8.4 billion
Source: Energy
Age: 104
Marital Status: Single, one bastard child.
Hometown: Springfield, U.S.A.
Education: Yale University, B.S.

Owner and operator of the Springfield Nuclear Power Plant for more than 50 years; also water works and a hotel on Baltic Avenue. Saved millions by canceling company's prescription drug plan, but reinstated same after assistant Smithers' thyroid condition brought him to the brink of death. Bought the Frank Gehry-designed Springfield Concert Hall from the city and turned it into a prison. Struggling Monty Burns Casino chain purchased this year by MGM Mirage for $2.1 billion. Has every disease known to man, and survives only because they perfectly counteract one another, an extremely rare medical condition known as "Three Stooges Syndrome." Credits longevity to Satan. Member since 1989.


#6 McDuck, Scrooge

Age: 80
Source: Mining
Net Worth: $8.2 Billion
Hometown: Duckberg
Marital Status: Single

Planet's richest waterfowl amassed one of the world's largest collections of gold coins and paper currency, kept in giant money bin atop hill in native Duckburg. Enjoys swimming in money. Moved to American West from native Scotland, amassing fortune from gold and copper mines. No longer invests--keeps everything in cash. Never gives to charity; never married. Lives in mansion with three great-nephews, Huey, Dewey and Louie. Member since 1947.


#7 Clampett, Jed

Net Worth: $6.6 billion
Source: Oil & Gas, Banking
Age: 51
Marital Status: Widowed, one child.
Hometown: Beverly Hills, Calif.
Education: Ozark Elementary, dropout

Parlayed small gusher on Ozark homestead into multinational energy juggernaught. Clampett Oil went public, 1984, but closely knit Clampett-clan still dominates executive suite; Jed, Chairman and CEO; Cousin Jethro oversees Russian operations; Elly May looks after environmental compliance; "Granny" handles finance. Also: banking operations. Clampett bought small savings and loan, 1967, ousted long-serving president, Milton Drysdale. Expanded operations across California, then West. Now 356 branches in ten states. Remains country-boy at heart; major player on bass-fishing circuit, serves 'coon at corporate retreats. Member since 1962.


#8 Wayne, Bruce

Age: 38
Source: Inheritance; Software
Net Worth: $6.3 Billion
Hometown: Gotham City
Marital Status: Single

Prominent playboy had tough year. Charged with murdering old-flame Vesper Fairchild. Exonerated partly through efforts of mysterious Batman and other costumed crime fighters. Shares of Wayne Enterprises, where he is chairman, languish based on lower-than-expected profits and Gotham City's sky-high crime rate. Orphaned during street mugging at age eight, went on to build then-tiny Wayne Enterprises into technology powerhouse. Rumors swirl over habit of keeping teenage boys as wards. Donates tens of millions each year to charities for police, paraplegics and orphans. Member since 1939.


#9 Howell, Thurston III

Net Worth: $5.7 billion
Source: Howell Industries
Age: 60
Marital Status: Married, no children
Hometown: Private Island, Pacific Ocean
Education: Harvard, B.A.

Fled U.S. to avoid federal tax evasion charges; rumored to be holed up on private Pacific island with a small cadre of trusted associates. Wife Lovey now back stateside, working Washington social circuit; lobbying for presidential pardon. Overcame youthful image as a playboy bachelor after inheriting privately held Howell Industries in 1955. Went on acquistion binge, snapping up undervalued assets, expanding into plastics, chemicals, concrete. Polished demeanor and self-deprecating manner disguise ruthless methods. Competitors, underlings never underestimate him twice. Still thought to control privately-held Howell Industries through various proxies; company has made recent push into "unsinkable" double-hulled leisure watercraft; new CEO insists on being called "Skipper." Member since 1964.


#10 Wonka, Willy

Net Worth: $2.3 billion
Source: Candy
Age: 57
Marital Status: Single
Hometown: Kent, England

Reclusive chocolate-factory owner was hit hard by low-carb diet craze, but has seen fortunes improve in recent months thanks to innovative new sweets conceived by protégé Charlie Bucket. Currently under investigation by British authorities for illegally importing unregistered laborers from Loompaland, paying them only in cocoa beans. Authorized autobiographical 2005 film in attempt to rehabilitate image; revealed that as the son of a dentist, was long forbidden to eat chocolate. Member since 1964.


#11 Bach, Arthur

Net Worth: $2 billion
Source: Inheritance
Age: 50
Marital Status: Divorced, no children.
Hometown: New York, N.Y.

Playboy layabout remains blissfully oblivious to changes in social mores. Still carouses in vintage '80s style: "I race cars, play tennis and womanize, but I have weekends off, and I'm my own boss." Attempt at marriage unsuccessful: no longer on speaking terms with former wife. Sobriety also unsuccessful. But inclination to blow family money on booze and toys tempered by a series of well-compensated butlers, who are instructed to keep almost all Bach's dollars safely in money market accounts.


#12 Scrooge, Ebenezer

Net Worth: $1.7 billion
Source: Banking, Investments
Age: 63
Marital Status: Single
Hometown: London, England
Education: University of Edinburgh

Briefly distracted by philanthropic causes a few years back, Scrooge is all business again. Came out of late '90s tech bubble unscathed, refusing to invest in stocks with "Humbug valuations." Sizable gold horde appreciating rapidly; said to make $10 million every time price of gold goes up by $1. Lifelong bachelor with few close associates. Strong believer in the paranormal; insists home is haunted by ghosts. Scrooge remains focal point for anger over excessive executive compensation. Most recent proxy discloses salary to be 927 times that of Bob Crachit, his long-suffering number two. Member since 1843.


#13 Croft, Lara

Net Worth: $1 billion
Source: Inheritance, Antiques
Age: 37
Marital Status: Single
Hometown: Wimbledon, England
Education: Cambridge University

Daughter of a British lord; raised in luxury. Gained fame and even more fortune by crawling into dusty tombs, charging through jungles and getting into gun fights. Archaeologist and author of travel books; responsible for numerous discoveries, including the lost city of Atlantis and Pandora's Box. Experienced windfall this year by licensing name to endorse variety of products, from handguns to hot pants. Rumored to have fought, killed Bigfoot.


#14 De Vil, Cruella

Net Worth: $1 billion
Source: Inheritance
Age: 65
Marital Status: Single
Hometown: London, England
Education: Fashion Institute of Technology

London fashion icon saw fortune grow as chain stores like J. Crew and Banana Republic embrace fur in fall collections. Recently gave up long-held dream of making fur coat from 99 Dalmatian puppies. EBay fanatic; online purchases purportedly include Hunter S. Thompson's cigarette holder, coat made from purebred pugs and Chihuahuas. Critics say she "ought to be locked up," but Cruella insists her only crime is her fashion sense. Insists that money can buy anything. Continues to live extravagantly but privately in the solitude of Hell Hall estate. Member since 1961.


#15 Malfoy, Lucius

Net Worth: $900 million
Source: Inheritance
Age: 51
Marital Status: Married, one child.
Hometown: Wiltshire, England
Education: Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry

Patriarch of ancient wizarding family is known for his luxurious white hair, advocacy for pureblood magicians, and violent hatred of Harry Potter. Family stores of gold and illegal Dark Arts artifacts amount to significant fortune, most of which is used to buy influence within the magical community. Caught red-handed burglarizing United Kingdom's Ministry of Magic; currently incarcerated in Azkaban prison. Once asked: "What's the use of being a disgrace to the name of wizard if they don't even pay you well for it?"

A decision to regret? Or regretting a decision?

Hardly an unker at 24, but a sensible head on his shoulders Russell has. (Boy I'm spouting Yoda-esque gibberish :P)Today Russboi guest-blogs a little about shutting up and getting on with life. If you ask me, he's doing a pretty good job now seizing the day and moving on himself. Carpe Diem!

Constant whining. Endless sad tales of how pathetic his life is. Persistant reminders of his miserable workplace. Sounds familiar? We all do that every now and then. But to what extent we let it affect us is the key in succeding.

A friend once commented on a mutual friend, "Ask SO-AND-SO to quit whining and be a man!" Harsh words but they do carry across a valid point. Maybe not so much to be a man, but rather to face the reality of his decisions.

How our life turns out depends entirely on us. We make decisions, and we live with them. We choose the place we work at. We choose the girl/boy we want to be with. There is no turning back, and regrets offer little value. Though we may lament that we chose a wrong path, it serves little purpose in helping us find our way. Pick yourself up, dust yourself down, lift that double-chin of yours up and carry on your way.

I cannot say that I have not made any bad decisions in this short life of mine. Yes I admit that I made a few mistakes that caused regrets, but then again, too few to mention. Sorry got that song in my head. I made a few mistakes, and I brooded over them too long. They affected me and the people around. Was it worth it? Definitely not. I wasted time, precious sleep, and *ahem* a few tears that all did nothing to ease the situation. Feel sorry and regretful for a few minutes, and after those few minutes, take out your map and move on with your life.

We still have time on our side.

Shifting Blues

Wifey called me yesterday evening while I was driving out to dinner with the mates, "Muffy dearest, we're moving house".

She likes to break bad news to me at the most inconvenient of times. A Beemer was tailgating me and I was trying to cut a blardy woman driver in a Chrysler Voyager 5 sizes too big for her infront of me. Road-hogging bitch!

And so I let out a desperate wail into the handsfree "Whaaaaaaat!?!"

Our landlord had called earlier and informed the wife that he was going to sell the apartment. Apparently even with the rent that we were paying him, he couldn't keep up with the monthly mortgage and maintenance payments. He and his Missus had lived in the spanking-new apartment for all of 2 months when we took over. Even back then, they couldn't pay up. Sounds bizarre but his dad had put in the downpayment for the 690k lovenest as a wedding gift. Trouble is, sonny-boy was expected to service the loan but had cashflow problems. The Maths should have been done before buying ya? Sheesh!

Well this is what you get for being vain and trying to live beyond your means.

So now, 1 year and 3 months into our 2-year tenancy agreement, wifey and me have to start looking for a new place after Christmas. I wonder why we signed the agreement in the first place since its not legally binding and as good as that piece of old newspaper our doggies pee and poop on. Double Sheesh!

Everytime I think of having to pack-up the kitchen I get a headache. All the wrapping of those plates, utensils and other breakables. Not to mention moving my wine collection and cleaning the fridge of junk. Triple Sheesh!

I'm going to miss the competition-specced pool plus the cosy gym and sauna. And the Japanese honeys out on the sundeck :P Also the whiff of grilled seafood from the BBQ pits by the river.

Lets see if we can find another apartment out for rent in the same estate. Now that would help ease the shifting blues somewhat! :))

Red Ribbon

Today being World AIDS Day, let us take some time, before the day is done, to say a little prayer for and remember the afflicted. 2584 HIV +ve Singaporeans...299 women, 25 children...and counting..

3rd instalment - unker kona recommends muzak

THE BEST OF - SUGAR RAY
another heralded party band...The Best Of reveals that Sugar Ray's music is the perfect soundtrack for relaxing and having a good time...OR rocking out at a beach fest with omnipresent thongs and bikinis and free-flowing beers :))

Mark McGrath and company made their major impact for a brief period in the 90s...while they have made some great catchy jingles, they arguably came almost close, but not quite, to attaining rock greatness...

still this is a very worthwhile addition to any collection...with standout tracks such as the unbelievably infectious EVERY MORNING and WHEN IT'S OVER, the twangy riffs and reggae overtones of FLY and the punkish ANSWER THE PHONE...



ALL STAR SMASH HITS - SMASHMOUTH
the 90s brought with them a tidal wave of feel-good party bands such as sugar ray and the offspring and smashmouth can be listed here together with the best of them...feel-good pop music is just soooooo wonderful innit? :D

truth is, we need bands like smashmouth, we need bands that are fun, and we need good music when it's time to party, hit the beach and get well and truly hammered...some call it frat boy music, but i just call it happy rock ;) this 20 track compilation obvious is a great selection of all their essential hits including my fave WALKING ON THE SUN, their biggest smash (excuse the pun hor) ALL STAR, HOLIDAY IN MY HEAD and their cover of the neil diamond hit I'M A BELIEVER (a stellar inclusion in the soundtrack of shrek)...



THE VERY BEST OF - SHERYL CROW
there are very few remaining artists who can really showcase true talent and acclaim while still making an impact on the charts...the mrs eric clapton to-be is one of these very few. since her 1993 breakthrough debut album "Tuesday Night Music Club," she has proven time and time again that women can really make it big in this business....she's a critics' darling with ordinary looks and an average, sometimes nasally voice, but strap a guitar on her, and she'll prove why she's lasted for ten years in this tough and competitive world of music...the words ROCK CHICK never seemed more apt...

one of the best compilation hits album that has come along in a while...almost every song is a winner and a genuine hit (except maybe THE DIFFICULT KIND)...personal fave is her re-do of the old stones hit THERE GOES THE NEIGHBOURHOOD...uptempo and absolutely rockable...perfect for a drive with the top down and stereo at unearthly volumes :D



UNPLUGGED IN NEW YORK "LIVE" - NIRVANA
so much has already been said about THE grunge band nirvana and their charismatic frontman kurt cobain that i do not feel the need to introduce them already...this is the very last collection of songs recorded before the untimely death of cobain...

nirvana caught many people out with this offering of stripped-down, neo-acoustic live recording which barely disguises the incandescent passion and unbridled fury of the classic nirvana sound...haunting and chilling to listen to at times, it provides both new and old fans with a renewed appreciation for the nuances of one of the greatest bands of recent times...to me, unplugged is undoubtedly nirvana at its most majestic!

COME AS YOU ARE and JESUS DON'T WANT ME FOR A SUNBEAM are my picks of first amongst equals...

RIP kurt... :(



THE GREATEST HITS - LENNY KRAVITZ
contains the seminal hits of one-man rock & soul revivalist lenny kravitz...the 15 tracks found here provide a surprisingly coherent reminder of just how much the artist has accomplished in a relatively short time...there are fast songs that rock ass, there are great slow songs to groove to, and a mix that falls right in between...showcasing a talent whose postmodern pop should play well into the new century...

i lurve all of them...least of which is black velveteen (quite a weird offering from him)...personal fave is MR CAB DRIVER, a cheeky ditty at the apathy of the modern world obsessed by racial-stereotyping :D



GARBAGE - GARBAGE
no no, not the music....just the self-titled album of this wonderful band fronted by the delectable (in a goth sense) shirley manson :D i think anyone who likes rock, punk, pop, techno, and eeriely meaningful lyrics will find their personal nirvana in this band...

garbage has many elements in its sound contributing to its broad appeal - incredibly infectious and danceable tracks almost pop-pish in nature but undeniably a rock album, first and foremost...in an era of post-grunge, where many up-and-coming bands were clearly derivative of such luminaries like nirvana and pearl jam, garbage's brand of rock/pop/retro offered a refreshing change of pace...

the album's massive hit, the super infectious ONLY HAPPY WHEN IT RAINS is without doubt, one of the greatest rock songs from the 1990s....both epitomizing and mocking the self-involvement and narcissistic outlook of generation X...other standouts are QUEER, SUPERVIXEN and STUPID GIRL...

get this....you'll never regret it :D



AMERICAN IDIOT - GREEN DAY
green day first burst into prominence primarily as a rock band playing rowdy, trashy yet sublimely catchy music but with this album, they tear up the blueprint and comes up with something unexpected: a punk rock concept album built around elaborate melodies, odd tempo changes, and a collection of songs that freely reference classic rock warhorses like the Beatles and Pink Floyd.

...akin to an operatic masterpiece :)) the worst song on the album is american idiot (which is a personal fave as i dislike dubya!) and that's actually pretty damned good...best song is BOULEVARD OF BROKEN DREAMS...

ok, so they might not be universally appreciated by one and all, but then again, this is MY list :P haha...



BIG ONES - AEROSMITH
i wasn't listening to music yet when aerosmith hit the big time in the 70s and subsequently faded out of the scene a bit towards the early 80s...but then these blokes never stopped rockin'from the 70's to the present...

they never failed the rock fans with their infectious blues-inspired rock music from gen X to Y, from the unsurpassed style of rock vocals in each track courtesy of Steven Tyler's howling voice to the ass kickin' riffs of Joe Perry...

for the beginners, this is a great introduction to aerosmith....the best....so far...best song is JANIE'S GOT A GUN...a spine-tingling song addressing the pain and torment of sexually-abused kids...won critical acclaim when it first came out...others are DUDE LOOKS LIKE A LADY, LOVE IN AN ELEVATOR, RAGDOLL and EAT THE RICH...

Style-Files@Unkster - This Little Piggy Went To Prada

Nursery Rhymes For The Blahnik Brigade



If you dunno Manolo Blahnik, you're probably not hip and happenin' enough for this new book by Amy Allen :)) Its the new must-have for the uber-kewl fashionista and metrosexual this festive season and guarantees you a giggle, perhaps while you're waiting for the sales-assistant to bring you that Hermes calf-leather sling from the shelf. But if you're really not in the know about designer chic like Jimmy Choo and Steve McQueen, most of the humor will be lost on you. However fret not because the book comes with the original nursery rhymes intact, side-by-side with the more stylish counterparts. See if you can recognise some of the rhymes after their expensive makeover...

This little piggy went to Prada,
This little piggy went to Cannes,
This little piggy dined at Nobu,
And this little piggy, Hakkasan.
And this little piggy went 'Wee wee wee wee!'
All the way home because she had a fat bottom!

Or this:

(to the tune of Frere Jacques)
Louis Vuitton, Louis Vuitton,
Mulberry, Mulberry?
Nappy bag dilemma - Lulu, Kate or Anya?
Shopping spree, buy all three.

Or this:

There was a young woman who lived in her Choos,
Though she once had a house in a smart Chelsea Mews.
So much on Jimmy,
The house had to go,
And with it, her Amex and husband in tow!

Or this:

Pussycat, pussycat, where have you been?
I've been to London to see McQueen,
Pussycat, pussycat, what did you do there?
I bought the collection and kissed lots of air.

Or this:

Twinkle, twinkle, diamond ring,
In a blue box tied with string.
Tiffany's new princess cut,
Twice the size of a baby's butt.
Twinkle twinkle, show your spark,
Can't change nappies in the dark.

Blardy bimbotic! :))